Recently, as I was leaving my bank in Los Angeles, I saw a stack of magazines near the door, entitled “Life After 50.” And if you have followed the media trail this past week, it’s all about Madonna turning 50. This is a big deal in our society where youth typically rules. Here’s a woman who has been a media icon for youth, beauty, talent, and sex appeal for decades. What’s the message? We as women have much to look forward to as we move into our 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and beyond. As Smart Women, we already knew this, didn’t we?
I can honestly say that after I turned 40 (I’m now 48), I began to feel quite comfortable with who I am. I’m secure emotionally, mentally, and physically. Am I perfect? Whoa, I don’t think I will ever reach “perfection” (and these peri-menopausal symptoms are annoying!), but I sure do like what I think, feel, and see today. However, that was not always the case. When I was in my 20’s and early 30’s, I would question my own ideas frequently. I also cared a lot more about what other people thought. And, while I’m comfortable in my decisions, I make sure to keep my trusted coaches, advisors, and mentors close when I need them.
We’ve come a long way, baby! Just a short time ago, after age 50, many women were encouraged to move into the retirement process. From 1925-1942, adult women were coined “the silent generation.” Women stayed home, gave birth to babies, cooked, and cleaned. That was the “societal expectation.” As we know, World War ll changed that course of thinking.
Today, in my work with women, it’s pretty darned exciting to see what women at age 40 and beyond are doing in their lives. I have a theory about this. In our early 20’s and 30’s, many of us go to college and obtain a degree in something that interests us at that moment in time. We pursue our careers, and in some cases, we become involved in relationships and begin our families. We either continue our career path and combine that with Motherhood or take a break to focus solely on family. Whether you are a working inside the home or outside the home (or both!), a woman’s life becomes consumed with the effort of integrating home life with a work and personal life. Somewhere beyond our mid-30’s, we begin to ask ourselves the questions, “What’s next?”, “Is this it for me?”, “Could there possibly be something else for me in my future when my children are off to school?” The questions begin rather quietly and sometimes with all of the noise coming from everything else in our lives—family, friends, career, we don’t hear them right away. We begin to feel that something is not quite right. As we see the age of 40 on the horizon, the voice becomes louder until we can no longer ignore it.
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